No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other.
– Matthew 6:24
Before I had kids, my Self and I didn’t get in very many arguments. I could basically satisfy most of its wants and needs. My life has been pretty easy, as lives go. And God filled in the gaps where I had difficulties here and there.
But after kids, I was in constant struggle with my Self. Because for basically the first time in my life, my Self was no longer my only master. Now there were the kids. I was trying to serve the kids.
No one can serve two masters! It’s true. It’s really true. I feel it almost every day. Kids are one master. My Self is another. And day by day this is how it goes: either I will hate my Self (by depriving it of its felt needs) and love my kids, or I will be devoted to my Self and despise (resent) my kids.
But there’s another way.
Now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the fruit you get leads to sanctification and its end, eternal life.
– Romans 6:20-22
I have another master now. Not the kids. Not my Self. Not any person in this world. But there is a Good Master who takes me in.
What is the Good Master like?
He’s very forgiving. When I make a mistake, he gently points it out to me, with kindness and understanding. He shows me where I went wrong but doesn’t blame me. Instead he comforts me because he knows how bad I feel when I mess up.
He’s self-sacrificing. My other boss always makes me take the heat for my mistakes. But the Good Master bears the consequences on himself. He’s willing to lay himself on the line for things that are all my fault.
He understands the little guy. The Good Master isn’t up there in his ivory tower, oblivious to the struggles and experiences of his employees. He’s been in the trenches. He went through everything I’m going through, so he can empathize with my weakness.
He’s a big team player. He never expects me to do anything on my own. Instead, he wants me to constantly talk to him and ask him for help, so that we can do everything together.
He’s a great improvisor. My screw ups don’t bother him in the slightest because he can take even the worst mess and turn it into an opportunity for something great.
And that means he’s process-oriented, not results-driven. He doesn’t care what my output is; he just wants to talk me through my work, day by day. It means a lot to him that I just show up and try.
He doesn’t want me to worry about budget. My other boss is tightfisted, and she wants me to think carefully about every penny spent. But the Good Master says, “No big deal! That’s just a drop in the bucket. I’ll take care of it–just charge it to my expense account.”
He doesn’t even actually need me as his servant. He’s entirely sufficient in himself, and all his needs are already met. So the whole reason why he’s taking me on is not for him, to serve his agenda, but because he knows that this is what’s best for me, this is what will make me happy.
No one can serve two masters. I can either serve my Self (or the kids, or other people), or I can serve the Good Master. And it’s hard sometimes, because the Good Master is infinitely patient. He doesn’t make me feel bad when I ignore him and serve my Self. Whereas, when I try to shift my allegiance away from my Self, the Worst Boss Ever usually throws a fit and tries everything she can to make my life miserable. And so most of the time I find myself going back to her. Yeah, it sucks. I know it’s not going to turn out well. But she’s familiar. I’ve grown up with her. I know what to expect.
So I serve my Self. But whenever I’m tired of her tantrums, her binges, her touchiness, her highs and lows, her ability to make my life miserable, then I can go to the Good Master. He’s always waiting for me. He’s always ready to take me in.
The Lowest Place 
💥💥💥